Think About It

May

How Do You Tell Your Story?

Posted by Bryan Clifton at 8:22 am

We all have a story to tell. The question is how we tell it.

Our self-image, personal drive, and attitude towards others center around the story we believe about ourselves. I’m convinced the majority of issues we face in our lives are a direct result of the stories we tell ourselves about the person in the mirror.

We either see our stories as an asset or a liability. Please forgive the accounting speak, but I believe this illustrates the point perfectly.

If we like the story we tell about ourselves, it is an asset. We are secure in all parts of our story. We realize that our achievements, mixed with our failures and short comings come together to mold our current situation. Our past experiences viewed collectively make us who we are today. No, things are not perfect, but overall we enjoy the story of our life.

If we do not like our story, it is a liability that needs to be covered up. We choose to keep our past hidden, afraid of what someone else would say about us if they knew the “real” person behind the mask. Instead of seeing past accomplishments, we focus on our previous mistakes. They take center stage. Since they are a focal point in our own life, we assume that is what others focus on when they see us. This idea could not be further from the truth. People see the person that you are now, not the person you used to be. There is no greater story than that of reconciliation and recovery.

Confidence and poise are direct results of a positive story. Uncertainty, jealousy, and fear consume the inner self of a life lived behind a mask.

What I have always loved about stories is they can be rewritten. Think of it a second draft. With a few internal changes to your attitude, you can turn a liability into an asset. That mistake you made in your 20′s could become a platform or bridge to connect to someone else. People are more forgiving than you expect.

If you help someone change the story they believe about themselves, you can change a life. We all remember the person that first believed in us and told us we could do more than we thought. It is time you believe in yourself the same way they did. They saw something in you that was special. Now is the time to see that in yourself. It starts by forgiving yourself of past mistakes and changing the story you tell about you.

Apr

In the Blink of an Eye

Posted by Bryan Clifton at 8:50 pm

In the blink of an eye, your life can change. On Thursday morning, I was at work hammering out a project when I received a call that changed my life. The person on the other end of the line informed me that my father had suffered a stroke in the Philippines. I didn’t know what to say or what to do. I was stunned and speechless. After I got over the initial shock, I tried to gather as many facts about the situation as I could, but English as a second language and emotional distress made it difficult to understand the other person.

Minutes later I was on the phone with all the family members and friends who I thought needed to know about the situation or could give immediate help. To be honest, I felt powerless and scared to death. I didn’t know if my dad was alive or dead. All I knew was that he had a stroke and was in a hospital in the Philippines. It would be close to twelve hours later before I knew the name of the facility or had direct news from the doctors about his status.

By Thursday evening, I had a flight booked to LA. During my layover in Las Vegas, I confirmed the rest of my trip to Manila. By Friday night, I was over the Pacific in a plane to see my father. In less than 48 hours, I went from Oklahoma to an unexpected trip to Manila. I am not sure when I will be returning.

My emotions through all of this have been scattered to say the least. I bounce from business mode, to fear, to sadness, then back to logical. I have had tears come to my eyes more times than I can count. When someone you love is hurting, all you want to do is be there with them and make it better.

Throughout all of this ordeal, I’ve felt the support of friends across the globe. Continual prayers have been a source of encouragement and helped me push forward when I wanted to sit back and cry. Advice from close mentors and friends helped shape my thinking and give me the right mindset to do what I need to do to take care of my dad.

Thank you to everyone who has helped me through the situation thus far, and keep on praying for his support. As I write this, I’m riding in a car on the road to visit my dad. I do not know what to expect when I see him. I’m scared.

Mar

Desperation & Inspiration

Posted by Bryan Clifton at 9:56 am

We work out of desperation or inspiration. They are the driving factors behind all our actions. They determine where we work, why we do it, and if we are willing to take a risk and seek change when necessary.

If the primary reason you go to work is to put food on the table and keep the bills paid, that is working out of desperation. However, if you would work even if you didn’t get paid, that is working for inspiration. Inspired work is getting paid to live your passion in a nurturing environment.

All of us would love to have inspired work, but it takes time to find the right fit. There are times you must work out of desperation, but please do not do it for long. Taking a job in a crunch to pay some bills is a desperate job, but that does make it a career path.

We have all met someone who took a job “just to pay the bills”, then 10 years later they still work the same job. They allowed a job choice made in desperation turn in to a career. The key to inspired work is focusing on ways to achieve your long-term goals, in addition to making an income.

Let’s look at the root of both words. Desperation comes from desperate. Desperate. That is not a word that most people like being attached to in other contexts. No one wants to date because they are desperate. However, when it comes to work, people take a job out of desperation far too often.

The root of inspiration is inspire. We all want to be inspired and be inspiring to others. It conjures up images of artists and designers with a lightbulb twinkling above their head. They had an “ah ha” moment. Wouldn’t that be a fun place to work, people constantly smiling with lightbulbs twinkling? Maybe that is a bit out there, but inspiring work creates ideas, nurtures them, and watches them grow. That is how I want to work.

Working out of desperation means you must do it. You have no other choice. You need to put food on the table and fix the roof that is leaking in on your living room couch. If you did not get your latest paycheck, you might fall behind on payments or have your items repossessed.

Desperate working puts your employer in the driver’s seat. You do what you’re told. Desperate workers are trying not to get fired. They do what they have to do to get a paycheck. Their job is simply a job. It is not a career or a passion. It is a paycheck. If someone down the street would pay $2 more per hour, they would switch.

Inspiration on the other hand is what gets you up in the morning. It consumes your thoughts, even when you should be focusing on other things. It is what you would do if money was not an object. If you had a day to do whatever you wished, this would be it.

Inspired workers take ownership of their creations. They seek personal growth and new opportunities. They get to work early, work while they are there, and stay late because they are in love with what they are creating. They bring new ideas to their team, rather than waiting on tasks to be assigned. They love what they are doing and can’t believe they get paid to do it. Their workplace is where they get paid to seek their passion.

I think we would all agree that inspiration work sounds a lot better than desperate work. But how do we get there? How do you transition from a job of desperation to one of inspiration?

The first step is setting goals. If you do not know what you are looking for, you will settle for anything. Be specific in your expectations, yet flexible in their appearance. Understand the principles of your ideal position, but understand they can manifest themselves in many industries or places.

Then make it happen. When you find a good fit (or create it), your stress level plummets. No longer will you wake up dreading work. Now it is a place to thrive, rather than merely get by. You have found inspired work.

I’m interested to hear your thoughts on this? Am I on track, or completely off course? I want your opinion.

Mar

Broke vs. Poor

Posted by Bryan Clifton at 11:06 am

I’ve met a lot of wealthy people who I would consider poor. – Jim Stovall (The Ultimate Journey)

Broke is a financial condition. Poor is a mental or emotional state. Being broke is temporary, but being poor is permanent unless you change your thinking.

Many of our problems are not the result of lack of money but rather lack of attitude. Our attitude creates a barrier that our actions cannot overcome. We box ourselves in to what we expect before we try to make them a reality.

When you are broke, you can make money by getting a job, selling items, or starting a business. Being broke is temporary.

The same is not true when you are poor. To break that situation, your attitude must shift before anything else can change. As long as you pit yourself as the victim of society, you will be. You are refusing to let yourself succeed or grow.

Mental attitude either creates extra barriers to overcome, or a launching pad to achieve your dreams. The only one that determines which path you take is you.

I have met many wealthy people who are bitter at life and constantly frustrated. They routinely buy new things because their old things do not fulfill them. They have more money than they know how to spend, yet they are poor beyond measure. They lack a solid core of values and their attitude is horrible. To fill that void, they shove more money, cars, boats, houses, etc in the gaping hole to attempt to fill it. No matter how much they try, this method will never work.

Contrary, some of the richest, most joyful people I have met lack the money to buy their next meal, let alone splurge on gifts. Yet they are rich.

Ultimately you are the one in control of your life. Situations might create additional hurdles to overcome, but that does not give you the excuse to create additional ones in your mind. If you want to change your situation, start acting like you are the one in control.

Mar

Principles

Posted by Bryan Clifton at 8:52 am

Principles span all cultures, generations, and languages. They happen regardless of your approval. Principles do not care about your opinion.Their force will be exerted no matter what.

But there is a great power resting inside principles. Since they always act in the same way, you can use them to your advantage. Once you comprehend how they work, their pattern becomes extra force for you to work with not against. They follow the same predictable pattern that you can leverage to your advantage.

Here is an example. The teacher says their will be a test. The questions to expect on the exam are identical to the study guide. Yet for some unknown reason, you spend hours studying unneeded material. Then at test time, you act shocked when the test is exactly like the study guide. Principles follow the same pattern over and over. They are predictable.

When you understand how they work, you can use them to your advantage. They follow the same predictable pattern. This knowledge gives you leverage to help meet your goals.

Knowledge and leverage become momentum for accomplishing your goals rather than resistance to work against.

Andy Stanley does a tremendous job laying this idea out in more detail in his book Principles of the Path. The quick summary of the book is summed up in one sentence that he repeats time and time again throughout the book. ”It is direction, not intention, that determines destination.”

In practicality, what he is saying is action must take the place of procrastination if we want to see results.

But this cannot be any action. Good choices lead to good results. Bad choices lead to bad results. Simple as that. Many of these results are the product of principles. Bad money management leads to unmanageable debt. Good money management leads to prosperity. That is a principle.

That brings up another question. Not all decisions seem clear at the time. How do we know which ones are good and which are bad? Sometimes we won’t know for months or years, but we do know that persistence on a good path leads to a good result.

The opposite is also true. A continued string of bad decisions creates a miserable line of dots no one wants to be connected to.